Saturday, August 11, 2012

discipline sucks sometimes.

So, this post has nothing to do with surrogacy. But, it has everything to do with family and raising kids. I would guess that at least once a month I ask Ali if she is 100% sure she wants "some of these," while referring to my children! She always has the same response, "of course!" My kids are crazy. My kids are stubborn. My kids are each a handful in their own way.

Olyvia has grown up so much lately, and we love it. She can have real conversations. She loves to help out with laundry, loading the dishwasher, setting the table, and other small tasks. It is great. However, the more she grows up, the higher the expectations I have for her. That, is not so great. After all, she is still only four.

This week, we grounded Olyvia for the first time. What did a four-year-old do to get grounded you might ask? Well, she went to the neighbors house without telling us. To some, that may not be a huge deal, but it has taken a lot for me to let her go out and play with the neighbors without complete supervision. So, when I went outside to get her to come in for bath time, I was furious when she was not outside. Thankfully, she hadn't wandered off or been kidnapped or anything, in fact, she was technically under the same roof as us. She just went into the attached-neighbors house to play. However, that is one of our rules, no going in cars, no leaving our cul-de-sac, and no going in houses without telling us first. Carlos grounded her to the house immediately. She could play anywhere in the house or in the back yard, but she could not go out and play with friends, she couldn't pick movies/tv shows, and she couldn't pick songs on the radio. Basically, all decision making for two days was handed over to Ethan!

Well, at first, we totally thought she understood what it meant to be grounded. Then, she kept yelling out to her friends to let them know she was grounded. She almost sounded like she was proud! It drove me crazy, but hey, she's four. In the evening of the first day, Ethan and I went for a walk and left her behind with Carlos since she wasn't allowed outside. When I came back, she was upstairs and being very quiet. I asked her what she was doing, and she said she was changing her panties because they were wet. Okay, so she had a little accident, no biggie. Then she proceeds to say she needs to change her dress because it is wet. She had completely peed her pants, while sitting on the carpet in the playroom, playing a game. She hadn't bothered to tell her dad. She just went up and tried to rectify the situation on her own. I was furious!

It was then decided that she would be grounded to her room for the second day of her grounding, meaning that she would also miss Family Day at Carlos' work and a pool party for Carlos' friends son. This also meant that I was stuck staying home with her. Wait...why did I ground her again? Ugh! Now I don't get to go anywhere fun either! The sacrifices we make. Now I understand why there were times when my mom would give in and let us go somewhere when we were grounded. At least I got a basically "kid free" day to do some major cleaning! I keep reminding myself that consistency is the key and if I stay strong it will benefit us all later. But next time I decide upon a discipline, I just might think twice and make sure I'm not going to be punished as well.

1 comment:

  1. Sorry I'm laughing my head off here! I always hated it when you're Dad grounded you.... exactly why I didn't ground you! Because it did ground me! I never really felt like making you stay in the house really was punishment... you for one, enjoyed laying around the house.